I guess I was the stupid one for even bothering to click on the link, but once I did I was blinded by the greatness of the article, courtesy of Cosmopolitan, that bastion of wisdom for the girl who has got it together. I mean, really, how stupid can an article get? (I had to post the link because otherwise I could have been accused for making up this garbage.) It said to ask yourself four questions to determine if your man is a keeper or a tosser. And here they are, the four questions that shed so much insight into the human condition we should all find ourselves evolved into a totally different species by the end of the year:1. Is he the jealous type?
2. Is he a cheapskate?
3. Is he afraid of commitment?
4. Is he trustworthy?
So what I want to know is how in this mess of a world would this test work? Well, my guy is TOTALLY jealous and he's a TOTAL cheapskate and he's TOTALLY afraid of commitment, but he's trustworthy, so I guess I need to take another test that's so TOTALLY NOT inane.
Or perhaps...
He's SO not jealous (I mean, he wants to share me with his other friend... awwww... how sweet is that?) and he's SO not a cheapskate, but he's TOTALLY afraid of commitment and he's SO not trustworthy so that means.... uh... that means.... he's a keeper? No, wait, he's a tosser, like oh my god! I TOTALLY don't KNOW!!!!!
Is this the kind of crap that American women read on a monthly cycle? Who needs Al Qaida to terrorize us and Religion to save us when we get two for the price of one in this month's edition of Cosmo???
13 comments:
I think the idea is if he fails any of the questions you're supposed to toss him. Naturally, setting up underhanded "tests" for your partner makes you very attractive romantically. And flirting with other guys in front of your partner is sooooo admirable. :|
Oh Raven, I know that YOU must be the master of playing underhanded games to make yourself more attractive to your sweethearts! lol... Do tell us about some coy game you've played recently...
LOL. Last time I went on a date was sometime last year. It was a first date, and the guy was clearly more nervous than I was. He picked at his food. I cleaned my plate. He was a nice enough guy, but afterward I realized I'd rather watch Dexter than go out with him again. He lost to a serial killer...
LMAO! I hope that guy never reads this blog...
how rude to only categorize guys into 4 things...they forgot other things too =P
thats what you get for flipping the mag.. haha
Dannie, here are additional questions I propose for Cosmo's list:
1. Is his thumb longer than his middle finger?
2. Does he let his pet frog sit on his shoulder wherever he goes? (My personal pet peeve...)
3. Does he properly center his hot dog on the bun?
4. Does he use the word "chartreuse" at least five times a day?
5. Can he swim from Florida to Antarctica underwater without taking a single breath?
J.T. you should totally send those in to Cosmo. They might want to rethink who their editor/writer is.
J.T., I also hope he never reads this blog!
I'd like to add that if a guy doesn't cut his waffles along the lines he must be tossed. Must be.
LOL! I seriously hope you are not watching his waffle disappear square by square! I shudder to think of your syrup requirements! Must he pour the syrup into the squares so that there are symmetrical amounts of syrup in each quadrant of the waffle?
Symmetrical syrup is desirable. :D
Raven,
'Symmetrical syrup is desirable.'
I suppose that is a perfectly grammatical, semantically acceptable sentence and yet it is WRONG, WRONG and WRONG!!! I don't think I will ever be able to eat waffles again without feeling a bit sociopathic...
:-P
ROFL!! You sociopath! For the record, I do cut my own waffles along the lines (it's acceptable to eat more than one square at a time, though), and I do generally try to pour some syrup in each square. I do not, however, demand these same admirable traits in a romantic partner. :)
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